My Saving Grace
by melinda08
Summary: Tragedy strikes Sacred Heart. When Laverne is in a coma and is fading fast, Carla is devestated. When no one else can get through to her. Perry helps her let go


This couldn't be happening. Laverne couldn't be lying in the room, waiting for an impending end that everyone knew about but Carla. Part of Carla knew what the outcome of this coma would be, but in her heart she still believed in miracles, despite what years of nursing had shown her. Maybe it was because this was her friend, maybe it was because she had been working with her the day before, but somehow Carla couldn't accept that Laverne would be leaving them soon.

So she did what she could do- she tried to bury herself in work, in gossip, in anything that would take away from the pain that she was feeling at the moment. In nursing she had learned how to separate her personal feelings from her work- she had to, or she never would have survived. Ironically, it was Laverne who had helped to teach her that lesson. She had shown her the therapeutic value of laughter, a lesson that would serve her well in her career. Laverne also had her Jesus, and Carla truly hoped that he was serving her well now. It would break her heart to think of her friend all alone. She couldn't deal with that.

Carla and Laverne were a lot alike in many ways- they laughed at the same jokes, they both knew the ins and outs of the hospital, and admittedly they enjoyed a daily bit of gossip. It would never be the same without hearing her voice around her again, Carla thought with a heavy heart. There would be other nurses. Always other nurses. The one constant around Sacred Heart was that everything changes. Throughout all of the staff changes and the heavy turnover rate, throughout all of the crazy days, Carla could always count on Laverne to get her through those times. Life was never going to be the same. She didn't want to try to imagine- her mind wouldn't allow her to- life without her trusted friend.

"Dr. Cox, have you seen Carla? I'm worried about her," JD said trying to keep pace with his mentor.

"Listen Carol, I wouldn't worry too much about her. She'll be fine. I'm sure she's just doing her job unlike some people who's only job requirement seems to be to annoy the bedevil out of me 24/7."

"I'm serious. I haven't seen her since after lunch. I think she's having a difficult with this whole Laverne deal. I wish there were something we could do to help her. I was hoping…"

"You were hoping I could…sweep in and save the day? Listen Judy. Everyone deals with grief in their own way. We don't have the right to tell others how to mourn. Maybe this is a conversation you should be having with the doughnut she calls a husband," Perry replied. Underneath his sarcasm he shared JD's concern although he never would admit it to anyone. Out of all of his coworkers it was Carla he cared most about and he hated to see her in this much pain. He walked away before JD could say another word.

Dr. Cox opened up the closet, the one where he knew Elliot spent a lot of her time, and sure enough there was Carla.

"Carla, I didn't expect to see you in here."

"Please just go away."

"You know I can't do that. What kind of doctor would I be if I did that?"

Carla raised her eyebrow.

"Carla I know that you're having a hard time letting go of Laverne. She's a good person. I don't respect too many people but I respect her. This is a sad day for Sacred Heart. But you're going to have to go in there and face her. You can't hide from her forever."

"Who says I'm hiding?"

"Everyone knows you are. We've all gone in to say our goodbyes. Let's not kid ourselves. That's what this is. She's not going to make it through the night. She's our friend and a darn good nurse. No one knows why this happened but it did and we owe it to her to tell her how much she means to us. I know I would hate it if I never got the chance to say…" Dr. Cox started.

Carla started to cry. "Don't say goodbye. I hate that word. How can I when there just won't be enough time to thank her for everything she's ever done for me? Who knows if I would still be a nurse here today if it weren't for her? She took on as her friend and taught me what she knew… I'm going to miss her…"

pulled her into a hug. "Don't tell me. Tell her."

00000

Everyone watched from across the floor as Carla finally entered Laverne's room and held her hand.

"Laverne, look at you. You look so peaceful. No one would ever know… What am I going to do without you? You taught me so much? You taught me how to laugh, how to learn, how to love. I was so green here but you didn't hold that against me. You just led the way for me to become the woman I am today. I watched your every move and I thought, now that's the kind of nurse that I'd like to be. So I watched. And I did what you told me to. And eventually I did things on my own, and I knew you were proud of me. You were more than my mentor, you were my friend. You were there for me throughout all the crises in my life and then when I met Turk- I wasn't sure if you were going to love him or hate him. I didn't even know if I was going to love him or hate him," she laughed. "But you were so supportive of us. No one was happier for me when I got married. I'm so glad I have him because I just don't know what I'm going to without you." She walked over and kissed her on the forehead.

Turk walked in and gently walked her out the door. Laverne lasted a few more hours, and the crew came in and checked on her every now and then. Carla made it with the support of her friends. There would be more difficult times for her, but she would never forget the love and kindness of Dr. Cox and Turk that night. Just when she needed them the most, they came through. She had to let go of Laverne, but she would always remember. Always.


End file.
